Frozen

Written & Directed by:  Adam Green
Starring:  Shawn Ashmore, Emma Bell, and Kevin Zegers


While Snowpocalypse was in full swing last week, I decided to have another viewing of Adam Green's Frozen.  Seemed fitting, watching a movie about 3 people freezing their asses off while I sat in my warm bed and watched the blizzard out my window.

Don't Look Down!

 Frozen is commonly compared to another stranded film, Open Water, except it is much better.  One of the things I liked most about it is that it has something new to offer, a ski horror film.  Having been skiing since I was a little kid, it immediately caught my attention since the idea of it has always been in the back of my head.  It is about 2 best friends, Dan and Lynch, who take their annual 'guys weekend' to go skiing.  Dan (Kevin Zegers, Dawn of the Dead) decides to take his girlfriend on the trip, Parker (Emma Bell), much to the chagrin of Lynch (Shawn Ashmore, X-Men Trilogy).  Since they spend all day babysitting awful Parker, they decide to make one last run while the mountain was closing.  After some confusion, a new lift operator comes in and shuts down the ski lift while the gang is still on it, hanging high off the ground.  Knowing the mountain is closed for the next 5 days, they must decide how to get down or freeze to death.

Once they get stuck on the lift, ideas start going through your head immediately about how they should get down.  One could argue they didn't always make the right choices, but I usually give people in life-or-death situations the benefit of the doubt.  This movie does a good job at putting you in their position, freezing alone up in a mountain with limited options to survive.  Another thing I liked about this movie is that they filmed on location.  It made it seem so much more real that they were actually on a ski lift while it was constantly snowing and hailing.  Kudos to Adam Green for this, since I don't think it would have had the same effect in a green room with CGI snow.



Speaking of Adam Green, the man has a good sized cult following after making Hatchet I & II.  While I didn't enjoy the first movie as much as others did, I have slightly higher hopes for the sequel (which is currently in my queue).  Hatchet II had a controversial release last year, the MPAA refused to lower it to an R-rating, so he had to release it to theaters as an Unrated cut.  After only 3 days, AMC Theaters decided to pull it from all their screens without even telling Mr. Green.  Needless to say, he was upset and is not in good terms with the MPAA or AMC.  Good thing you can always count on AMC to show trash like The Roommate (opening at 5% on Rotten Tomatoes)!



The acting was good for a horror movie as well.  Kevin Zegers plays a decent pretty boy in Dan, while Shawn Ashmore nails the pot-head who longs for a girlfriend.  Emma Bell is probably the weakest of the bunch, but still not as bad as most female leads in horror movies.  In fact, she is going to star in Final Destination 5 (should have stopped at 2). 



I would recommend this movie to horror fans, or anyone who has ever been skiing/snowboarding and wondered what would happen if they got stuck on the lift.  There is a little amount of blood and gore, but not much.  What do you expect out of a movie that has only 3 people in it?  Overall, the production value was great and the acting was good.  While taking place in only 1 spot for the majority of the movie, it does a good job at not boring you to death.  It is one of those movies where you can easily put yourself into their shoes and think about what you would do if you were in that situation.  The reviewer for Blu-Ray.com calls it 'one of the scariest movies ever made,' which is going a bit far, but it is definitely worth checking out, especially on a miserable winter day.  Is it summer yet?

Total Score:  6/10

Buckets: 1.5/5

I Spit on Your Grave (2010)

Directed by:  Steven Monroe

Written by:  Meir Zarchi (original), Stuart Morse

Starring:  Sarah Butler, Jeff Branson, Andrew Howard

"Oh, no you didn't!"
(2010 Version)

It has been a slow few months for Splatter Films.  Winter is in full swing and good movies are hard to come by, especially good horror movies.  So instead of waiting for a good one, I just watched a few time-killers, hoping to be surprised.  One of which was I Spit on Your Grave, a remake of the 1978 version with the same name.  There was a little buzz surrounding it, since the original was very controversial for its time.  I figured I’d give it a shot, since it had an appealing poster, and an IMDb rating higher than 6 (eliminating my other viewing option, Chain Letter).  While I’m sure I made a better choice, but I’d recommend choosing ‘none of the above.’

As with most movies, I try not to read up about it too much, since plot descriptions and reviews tend to spoil the movie and ruin the experience.  From my experience, movies are almost always better with no expectations.  Unfortunately, this movie could not be saved no matter how much I knew about it.

Let me enlighten you with the lovely plot details.  We are introduced to a young lady named Jennifer Hills (Sarah Butler) who is driving to a cabin in the middle of the woods to write her next novel.  I'm not sure if they actually gave a reason why she chose this particular town to stay in, but it turned out to be a bad choice.  After wearing as many skimpy outfits as she possibly can in a few days time, the local troublemakers decide to have some fun with the lonesome city girl.  The hoodlums, led by Johnny (Jeff Branson) and dirty Sheriff Storch (Andrew Howard), harass her for a while and then end up raping her repeatedly.  Before they can kill her and get rid of the evidence, she manages to escape down the river and comes back to exact her revenge.

While the first half reminded me much of The Last House on the Left, the second half just turns into Hostel with torture porn shots coming one after the other.  Jennifer's character wasn't developed enough in the beginning to justify making her revenge plausible.  From all we know, she just likes to jog, write novels, play with her cell phone, and drink wine... but I guess she also dabbles in torture.  She single-handedly manages to turn the tables on each of the 5 people who raped her, using everything from Lye, fishing hooks, pulleys, hedge clippers, and a shotgun to replicate each rapists personality trait.  Either she's secretly a psychopath, who just let the people overpower her at first just to think they've gotten the upper hand, or she just watches too many horror movies.  Either way, I wasn't buying it.

The kills are decent, since they are semi creative and extremely painful looking.  There isn't a ton of blood in it, but enough to satisfy a few gore hounds.  The acting was decent, some parts are a little shaky, but overall not a bad job.  Andrew Howard probably did the best job playing the dirtbag Sheriff, but Sarah Butler and Jeff Branson were decent as well.  One of the actors went full retard for his part, which never bodes well, and adds little to the movie.  All in all, the production value wasn't terrible, but the editing and script were sub-par, even for a horror movie.

In conclusion, this movie is not worth seeing.  Many people will immediately be put off by the graphic rape scene(s), and the climax (no pun intended) just isn't worth sticking around for.  It is just so distractingly unbelievable that a girl like Jennifer can think of these elaborate schemes and traps, days after being physically and mentally tortured.  There are just way too many gaping plot holes in I Spit on Your Grave.  Even putting this aside, the movie just doesn't have enough substance to merit a viewing.  And for those of you wondering, there is no spitting on anyone's grave the entire film.  They couldn't even get the title right.

Total Score:  3/10

Buckets:  2/5

Devil

Directed by:  John Erick Dowdle

Written by:  Brian Nelson

Starring:  Chris Messina, Logan Marshall-Green, Bojana Novakovic, Jenny O’Hara, Bokeem Woodbine, Geoffrey Arend


It’s been a long time since I’ve watched a new horror movie, hence the stretch to write a review for Devil.  Being a much dreaded PG-13 horror film, and based on a story by M. Night Shyamalan, my expectations were rock bottom. Luckily, it turned out to be pretty decent.  In fact, it might even be his best movie since Unbreakable, which isn’t saying much.  Nothing can be worse than The Happening (except maybe Twilight).  This is probably due to the fact he had little to do with this movie as possible, leaving the writing and directing to someone else.

The plot is based around an old folktale that begins with a suicide, and ends with the devil punishing a group of people until no one remains.  The movie starts with that suicide, a jumper from a large office building.  After that, the wheels are set into motion as all of our main characters become trapped in an elevator in that building.  On the case is Detective Bowden (Chris Messina), who is a recovering alcoholic after his family was killed in a hit and run accident.  Also behind the scenes are a couple of security guards, one of whom is the token folklore expert, giving out vital information sparingly.  He naturally proves his theory to the police by dropping toast and having it fall jelly side down (or is it jam?).  Anyways, this ‘devil’ will be disguised as a regular human and our job during the movie is to figure out who it is.  Is it Sergeant Crisp from The Rock (Bokeem Woodbine)?  Maybe… maybe not.

Everyone involved did a pretty good job here (although the detective kind of bothered me for some reason).  As the film chugs along, you change your suspicions to a new person every 10 minutes.  Once you are sure its one person, they die, so you start suspecting another, and then they die.  There aren’t any clues revealed to completely give it away, and everyone has their own reasons to not be trusted.  The best way to watch is to just enjoy the ride and not over-think things, since you’ll most likely be wrong. 

Production value was decent, and they made the most out of the low budget, which was more than earned back its opening weekend.  With an 80 minute runtime, this movie will not waste too much of your time.  If you skip the ‘clever’ upside down intro shots and the credits, that leaves you with about an hour and 10 minutes, an ideal length for a movie like this.  You’ll only have to wait an hour to find out who the devil is!

Overall, this movie turned out to be better than I thought, but not great.  It wasn't overdone and stupid like most Shamalama movies, so that was nice.  There also weren't any plot holes that I could think of, which is rare for most mainstream horror movies.  That combined with the short runtime made it a very efficient thriller.  Devil is what it is, and it’s a good popcorn flick.  So don’t be the ‘smart guy’ and continuously try to impress people by figuring out who the devil is from the beginning.  Just sit back and keep your theories in your head, since no one cares if you knew it was them all along… because you most likely didn’t. 

Total Score:  5/10

Buckets:  0/5

Frontier(s)

Written & Directed by:  Xavier Gens

Starring:  Karina Testa, Samuel Le Bihan, Aurélien Wiik, Chems Dahmani

I originally came across this movie because it was being compared to some of my favorite horror films, Inside and Martyrs.  After seeing it, I would best compare it to a mix between The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Hostel.  However, Frontier(s) was a bit more enjoyable to me than both of those.  While the French film lacked a good dose of Biel, and the sick humor of Eli Roth, it more than made up for it with the buckets of blood that single handedly caused theaters to pull this NC-17 gem.

As mentioned previously in my review of From Within, this movie was originally part of the “8 Films to Die For” in the 2007 After Dark Horrorfest lineup, but was replaced in theaters because of the NC-17 tag.  That rating is known as ‘box office suicide,’ but I was surprised that the Horrorfest would pull their best movie in order to gain a few more viewers.  Regardless, I made sure I saw it and you should too.

Frontier(s) is about a group of small-time hoodlum teenagers named Yasmine, Alex, Tom, Farid, and Sami.  They just stole a bag of money during the riots in Paris and decide to flee to Amsterdam to get away from the fighting.  Since Sami was somehow shot, his sister Yasmine (Karina Testa) and her ex-boyfriend, Alex (Aurélien Wiik), take him to the hospital.  Meanwhile, Tom and Farid get head start on the trip and drive for the border, or frontier, with the money.  They ultimately decide to stay at a small cottage for the night.  While at the cottage, Tom and Farid are treated like royalty so they tell the others to join them for the night.  Before they arrive, shit hits the fan and Tom and Farid are running for their lives.  It turns out the Inn is being run by a deranged Nazi family that kills everyone that stays at the cottage.  When Yasmine and Alex arrive, they have no idea where their friends are, but soon find out they must too fight for their lives.  

While not the most original story, the action starts almost immediately and the bloodshed is constant.  There are plenty of cringe-worthy scenes, but it is not pointless ”torture porn” like in Hostel.  The entire time, the characters are fighting and clawing for survival.  They are always close to getting away, only to be thrown right back into the mess of things.  The director, Xavier Gens (Hitman), did a fantastic job with the pacing and at keeping the tension high throughout the film.  The last 15 minutes is pure, nonstop, bloody entertainment.  It also contains what could be the best death scene I’ve ever seen.

Like with all films, there were some minor drawbacks.  The back story involving the heated political race and the ensuing riots seemed pointless.  While there needs to be some story to how the kids get to the death cottage, it just seemed like it was overly done.  With most horror movies, there are some ‘what were you thinking?” moments.  There was the typical escape routine where the victim gets in the first car she sees on the property.  Obviously the person driving to where you just came from is a bad guy.  Or the great decision to hide in an oven when you are fleeing for your life.  When has that ever been a good idea?  Regardless, I forgive their mistakes.  You can’t expect people to make cold, calculated decisions when they are being chased by a crazed Nazi. 

In conclusion, Frontier(s) is a fantastic example on how to make a good horror movie.  The actors did a great job, and story was constantly engaging all the way up to the great finale.  Also, the death scenes were all fantastic and there was no shortage of blood.  If I had to recommend any horror film out of all the “8 Films to Die For” series, this is the one to see.  In terms of French horror, I’d rank this only behind Inside, Martyrs, and High Tension.  While they are all entirely different movies, they are all prime examples of horror at its finest.  Highly recommended!

Total Score:  8.5/10

Buckets:  5/5

Deadgirl

Directed by:  Marcel Sarmiento & Gadi Harel

Written by:  Trent Haaga

Starring:  Shiloh Fernandez, Noah Segan, Michael Bowen, Candice Accola

Getting away from the mainstream horror genre, I decided to give a film called Deadgirl a try.  I’ve read a few positive reviews online (and a few negative), so I tracked it down and watched it after work last week.  This is a common routine for me, and it’s a gamble whether or not the film turns out to be good.  That’s part of the rush for me; finding an unknown film with a cult following and not reading much more into it.  I find it better to watch a movie that you don’t really know much about, and not letting the trailer show you half of the movie.  That way, nothing gets ruined for you and the movie develops the way it was intended.  While this methodology tends to waste your time every now and then (i.e. Jack Ketchum’s The Girl Next Door), it also brings along some pleasant surprises.

Deadgirl is one of those movies that really doesn’t fit into a certain genre.  The best way I can describe it is being a high school/horror/romantic comedy/zombie flick, in that order.  That’s one thing I really enjoyed about the film, it’s not something I’ve seen before.

The movie follows two loner high school students who stumble upon a mysterious girl while doing one of my favorite past times, skipping class to roam the basement of an abandoned mental hospital.  As they soon find out, the girl cannot die.  Since she is chained to a table, one of them seems to think it would be fun to make her his personal sex slave.  The rational student, Rickie (Shiloh Fernandez), finds what his friend, JT (Noah Segan, Brick), is doing to be insane and obviously wants nothing to do with his activity.  Unfortunately, word spreads about what they have found and their sex-depraved classmates want to see the ‘deadgirl’ for themselves. 

The viewer is put into Rickie’s corner from the start, since he is the lonely romantic who always does the right thing.  He’s the familiar high school kid all of us know well, the one that loved the girl that he couldn’t get.  Being an outcast is all he’s been known to be, and the same goes for JT.  The main difference between the two is that JT was willing to give up trying for the girls he couldn’t get.  He had found his salvation chained to a table in an abandoned basement, and that was good enough for him.  He was happy with her no matter what Rickie said.  In the end, ‘deadgirl’ consumes him and creates a whole new monster.

While this movie does cross some lines, I couldn’t help but enjoy the ride.  The acting was a little sluggish at the start, but everyone ends up putting in a great effort.  Noah Segan is the standout for this movie as JT, but the other actors played their characters superbly as well.  Some questions were left unanswered, like where the girl came from and what she truly is, but I feel that it didn’t really hurt the film.  In fact, a little mystery is great.  Sometimes I don’t like it when everything is spelled out for me.  

While it does have its flaws, I recommend Deadgirl because it is something truly different.  It definitely won’t please everyone; in fact it probably won’t please many.  While it may sound hard to believe, this movie has a lot more under the surface than just people having sex with a dead girl.  I feel sorry for those who don’t take anything more out of this film, since I believe the writers did a great job creating an original story here.  It really questions a humans capabilities and moral standings, but it makes you laugh at the same time.  While there is a strong element of romance involved, I wouldn’t have this movie penciled in for ‘Date Night’ if I were you.  It does contain someone having their penis bitten off and shitting out their insides (sucks to be you).  So there’s that…


Total Score:  6.5/10
Buckets:  2.5/5